Come Fly with Me ……

How a UKPT workshop enabled Adele to see the world

"Have you ever been on a plane or train or on land with the sensation of an ever-pressing full bladder, and the complete inability to release the pressure no matter how many times you sit on that toilet? I've been there too many times to recall; in parts it has dictated my life. At its worst I was unable to go to certain clubs in my university days as the toilets were seemingly incompatible with my bladder. Over the years the safety behaviour becomes an insidious feature along with avoidance, and then the cycle continues and your mind continues to tell you that you cannot and will not wee even before you have the urge to try. This was my story but not anymore…

It started with finding UKPT on a Google search after a very frustrating plane journey and my thankfulness that my bladder didn't explode. I attended a workshop with mainly men, but Ann was on hand and this was my first step to recovery. It was almost an Instant rewire in my mind to feeling more in control and more confident. I would try different toilets, and I started to be kinder to myself with the positive self-talk that if I couldn't go it was just a misfire. If you berate yourself the 'self-harm' of not weeing will be ever present. I had mainly got over my issue on land by just always trying whenever I was out. If you keep trying the fear of the lead up to a toilet will start to dissipate.

Then there's my nemesis, PLANES, TRAINS and anything that MOVES. I started to book an aisle seat, so I didn't interrupt anyone. I would go to the plane toilets even if I didn't need it to get used to the environment. I would opt for the back toilets, so I didn't feel watched (another issue for us sufferers when the reality is, no one cares!) I also went for a few sessions of hypnotherapy which as a nonbeliever was oddly a positive experience and then came my breakthrough. A flight to Greece. I did a wee...sat there on this plane I felt euphoric by doing what most people take for granted, I was weeing! As a keen traveller (usually taking many planes to go far afield this was a world of happiness) in the run up to plane journeys I started YouTubing plane toilets. Many influencers give you a tour of the toilets and I would watch it whilst having a wee at home to associate a relaxed environment with the plane toilet. An unusual way of de-sensing but it really was the breakthrough for me along with visiting a consultant urologist which was recommended by another fellow female sufferer.

The very big decision of visiting a consultant urologist was because long haul was looming and I needed to take my power back. I knew this meant opting for self-catheterisation and I have avoided this for too long. After speaking with other women and men, I took the plunge. Two appointments later, a box full of catheters and a couple of not painful but uncomfortable attempts I was ready for long haul...and guess what, I never needed them. I naturally did a wee on every single flight. I even had a window seat and interrupted my neighbour to wee twice on one flight.

The mind is a mystical and sometimes detrimental place, but it can also be changed, re wired and put into its rightful place. Next stop for me, Brazil and Argentina!"