An ever-changing group of women with paruresis meet up on zoom every couple of months for encouragement and exchange of information. Some of you may be wondering what we talk about - here's a summary of our most recent session.

There was a lot of discussion about catheters. Q had discussed them with her urologist who had said that he would prefer her to catheterise rather than retain urine for excessively long. X doesn’t use catheters often but whenever she does, she takes a preventative antibiotic afterwards (agreed with her GP at an appropriate dose).

X noted that catheters have an expiry date after which the sterile packaging may be compromised.

X uses a hands-free, female self-catheterisation mirror with an integral light when she uses catheters www.bright-mirror.nl/en/bright.html She has also had some success using a sheewee www.shewee.com

Note that the UKPT don’t suggest that all women with paruresis should use catheters. Some women find that having a catheter discreetly tucked in their handbag can be enough to allow them to relax enough to pee normally. It can break the cycle of overthinking about what you would do if you weren’t able to pee – you could use a catheter, so that stress is eliminated. Only you can decide if catheters are right for you.

X’s CBT therapist had recommended her reading “Overcoming Low Self Esteem” by Melanie Fennell overcoming.co.uk/646/Overcoming-Low-Self-Esteem---Fennell as low self-esteem is a major issue for so many of us.

There have been several newspaper articles recently featuring elements of paruresis. Some of these have been featured in recent UKPT blogs – you can read “Decades on I am still traumatised by my visit to the school toilets”, “Is peeing driving you Spare?” and “The Telegraph – Agony Uncle” all on the News and Blog page of the website www.ukpt.org.uk/paruresis-news-and-information.
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Two quick things to remember – Not all disabilities are visible – if you find accessible toilets easier for you to manage your paruresis at times then use them, without feeling guilty.

Visit as many toilets as possible so that they become less scary places.
Remember NEPAL – Never Ever Pass A Loo!

Finally - one of the women I’m in contact would like to attend a follow up weekend workshop in Reading in due course. If anyone else is interested do let me know – we need more than one female attendee in order to run it.

If anyone would like to know more feel free to drop me an email at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.