Hit a wall with desensing in cubicles

I've got to the point where I can pee in a cubicle most of the time, the only times I cant are if they are tiny and extremely quiet with someone right next to me then sometimes I can pee and sometimes I can't but most of the time I'm fine but obviously not 100% success rate but I'm reliable in cubicles. What's my next step in desensing, I feel urinals are a bit too much of a big next step? Thanks

#150 by David

Have you tried with the cubicle door unlocked or open ?

#151 by Julian

No not yet, should I start with the door unlocked then in a quiet batroom? Thanks, David

#152 by David

I'd say start wherever you are currently comfortable, but just try with the door unlocked. When that's Ok for you just move on to having the door open - so you are dealing with the possibility that someone might try to use the cubicle while you're in there, but the reality is anyone seeing you will just say sorry mate and move on. Getting comfortable with that possibility and still being OK to pee is good progress I think.

Do you pee 'Loud and Proud' in the cubicle, I was advised to aim at the water and makes lots of noise so you become happy that people know you are peeing, but off course the reality is no one actually notices or cares, they're just getting on with their own lives and stuff. I think this helped me.

The thing that really helped me, was understanding that my anxiety was coming from worrying about people noticing me NOT peeing and it's the anxiety that stops you peeing. So now I work on truly believing "no one notices what I'm doing, if they do they don't care, and if they notice and care then I don't care", and slowly I'm realising this is actually true.

Good luck David, let us now how you get on.


#153 by Anonymous
Time to create page: 0.132 seconds
Copyright © 2017 United Kingdom Paruresis Trust. All Rights Reserved.

UK Charity Registration Number 1109541
Privacy and Cookies Policy