U.K. PARURESIS TRUST

UK paruresis trust

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Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012

Posted by C on 22/1/2012, 8:42 pm
Message modified by board administrator 23/1/2012, 7:49 pm

Hi,

Just a quick message to say how excellent the workshop was this weekend!

I was naturally a little apprehensive but it wasn't long until I was feeling comfortable and relaxed in a friendly and understanding environment. I have progressed well over the weekend and it has helped me on the path to extinguishing this burden. Everyone was at different levels upon arrival and at different levels when leaving - everyone agreed that they had made their own personal progress.

We've all left with a plan to keep the momentum going and I shall be doing that. It's no immediate cure, years of this situation will take a little time to unravel it, so be patient, be confident and be at the next event. Great that it was local too for me, even though many people traveled from all over.

Excellent event Andrew and a sincere thanks.

Good luck to everyone, I look forward to catching up and keep up the momentum.

C.

Re: Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012

Posted by Will on 22/1/2012, 9:51 pm, in reply to "Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012"

Hi C,

I too was a bit apprehensive and nervous about attending the workshop, but once the discussions began and we all got our own stories out in the open I felt very comfortable and at ease with the group, a great bunch of lads!

The whole weekend was very enjoyable, I learnt a great deal from this and have made an amazing progression with this problem which I now have the confidence to continue working on and resolve for good.

Andrew, keep up the good work, you really are changing the lives of people for the better, who have suffered with this for far too long and we all appreciate your efforts.

Good luck lads and see you again soon.

Will.

Re: Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012

Posted by Conor on 22/1/2012, 11:43 pm, in reply to "Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012"
Message modified by board administrator 23/1/2012, 7:50 pm

Couldn't agree more, C. I was apprehensive too, to the point of not quite believing I was, yes, actually arriving in Manchester and, yes, actually getting on that strange tram, and yes, booking into that hotel and, yes, going down that lift at five to seven, and (weirdest of all) heading towards that conference centre...

And it was okay! No one pointed and stared, no one cared; to everyone not involved in the workshop, I was just a nobody in a city hotel. Of course that was all I was.

And the workshop was brilliant! Will keep this short as a bit wrecked, but the first thing for me was how normal everyone was; the second, how supportive and trusting; the third, how much all this helped me to make progress. (Rome in a day and all that but, nevertheless... progress.)

So I echo C: excellent event, Andrew, and a sincere thanks. Good luck to everyone with his plan!

Conor.

Re: Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012

Posted by Rob on 23/1/2012, 5:41 pm, in reply to "Re: Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012"

Agree with all the previous comments; the workshop wqas excellent, much better than I'd expected and the group were fantastic, a really great bunch of people.I made more progress than I had thought possible.

On a slightly amusing note, On the way home I had quite a bit of time to spare at Picadilly train station so I thought I'd have a bit of a practice, so found the loos: A barrier system with a turnstile, 30p entrance, manned by someone because it wasn't working very well with a queue of about 15 football supporters waiting to go through the barrier. Did a U-turn.

Re: Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012

Posted by Rob on 29/1/2012, 11:29 am, in reply to "Re: Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012"

Some hopefully useful info to people who are in the midlands: I have used 4 motorway services in the past few days for desensing and they're all different levels of difficulty. Keele services southbound (between J15/16 M6)is excellent for starting (with big screens) Then in increasing level of difficulty are Stafford Service southbound (J 14/15 M6), Keele northbound and then Stafford northbound. Have made some progress! I told a friend about the problem yesterday and I don't think it really registered: what Andrew says is true....to people who don't suffer it seems like a complete non-issue!

Re: Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012

Posted by Alan on 29/1/2012, 5:08 pm, in reply to "Re: Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012"
Message modified by board administrator 30/1/2012, 2:28 pm

To everyone that has posted a response to the workshop at Manchester last weekend. A "HUGE" thank you for being there, a genuine great bunch of people. I have e mailed Andrew a couple of times with my progress and forgot about the message board.
I concurr with all the comments that all the guys have posted and cannot thank thank Andrew and the Trust for their support.
Just to let you all know I am back to work (but nearly bottled it) I have been to the local (pub) and used the loos, and even when in town with the wife on Saturday used the public loo (Ok it was a cubicle ) but this is a first for me for as long as I can remember.
I am a bit sloppy on the self admin side but you guys have reminded me of how important it is and I will be getting the file out tonight for some revision.

Good luck to you all and see you in March.

Alan

Re: Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012

Posted by Gareth on 29/1/2012, 11:12 pm, in reply to "Re: Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012"

I'd like to echo the comments already posted.

If you're reading this as someone who suffers from paruresis, you've already taken the first step towards beating it. The next step is to get in touch with Andrew and get yourself onto a workshop.

I've made a lot of progress in the week since Manchester. My wife's helping me with de-sensing at home, and I've identified a set of public toilet venues that I can use for practice on my drive home from work.

I've just come back from a weekend away with friends : my good news is that I used urinals in a railway station, a rugby club (yes !) and some pubs and also managed to use the end of a trough in one pub. There were a few misfires here and there, but THOSE ARE ALLOWED, aren't they ?

At one point (OK, I'd had a few beers), I was peeing at a urinal when one of my friends came in. He started talking to me, and I carried on peeing !! Amazing...

So, I've still got a long way to go but the green shoots are there. Hoping to make it to the follow-up in March.

Re: Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012

Posted by Tom on 1/2/2012, 3:21 pm, in reply to "Re: Manchester Beginners Feedback - Jan 2012"

I agree with all the points mentioned above and would like to thank Andrew for arranging the whole thing.

To all those thinking of coming...

Paruresis is something seldom talked about and you, like me, may have felt you were the only person in the world with it. If you can pluck up the courage to come to a workshop however, you will realise it is full of 'normal' people like yourself, and for maybe the first time in your life you will be able to talk openly about something that has previously been avoided at all costs.

The workshop is not a magic wand, but it does give the tools for beating Paruresis, and with practice and follow-up sessions I think eventually I could get on top of this thing.

Good luck to you all.

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