U.K. PARURESIS TRUST

UK paruresis trust

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USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?

Posted by Deklan (UK) on 5/1/2012, 1:25 pm

Been Cursed with this problem, unable to pee at the urinals since age 7, now 57. Spent Thousands Of Pounds on CBT and gradual exposure therapy one to one. Hypnotherapy (Tried 3 therapists) And other forms of psychotherapy all to no avail. Got some help but as soon as the therapy is left off and it neverleaves me only about 30% then its all back again. I have found social situtations very anxious and now even going in a public place causes problems. Often Cubicals are unfit for use sometimes I can go there but mostly not, get all worked up and very intense anxiety. The Dr has listened and tried to help but problem still there. Therapists tell me I am OVER SENSITIVE and TOO HIGHLY STRUNG in other otherwords anxiety is out of control. Yes I have tried all sorts of ways to calm myself. I have no social life now at all and now have some prostate problems which makes the condition a lot worse. HAS ANYONE BEEN 100% CURED? If so please get back to me, I am desperate to try ANYTHING that might help. My Dr has suggested EFT, Emotional Freedom Techinque, has anyone tried this? There again like most therapy long term its another moneyspinner,between £45 and £75 per hald hour session, There are workshops two days but its getting there. I have a lot of other health issues and I am no medically retired. I find if I go into a pub or other situtaion a social group its fine for a few days or weeks then, you do get talked about, after all a MAN is designed and expected to naturally be able to use the urinals, or if that is not the case, why are they there?

Re: USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?

Posted by Simon on 6/1/2012, 7:49 am, in reply to "USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?"

Hi Deklan
I am sorry to hear about your problem. I too have suffered with paruresis since a young age. I have however been on 3 workshops and ever since the first one I have experienced continuing progress.
My life has been completely transformed and I would have to recommend a workshop for the following reasons-
a) intensive CBT practice, always in your comfort zone but pushing your boundaries at your own pace
b) meeting fellow sufferers immediately makes you feel more comfortable about your condition - something you won't experience talking to doctors and other professionals
c) improving your outlook and
d) planning steps for the future - from your post i can see you are very negative and stressed, which is understandable. However if you could get to 30% improvement and maintain it, wouldn't that be progress? If you could maintain that then you could envision making a further 30% progress... but you'd have to allow yourself a few set backs. The workshops have taught me so much about how our performance varies with tiredness, stress, about a whole heirachy of challenges. So nowadays if I can't go once it doesn't ruin my night, i just come back in 5 or 10 minutes. And most times I will use the urinals without a problem.
I hope this has been of some help.

Re: USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?

Posted by sim on 6/1/2012, 11:48 pm, in reply to "Re: USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?"

I found a technique on one of the american paruresis links that seems to work if I am not in a small area or with people waiting behind me, ie no performance pressure.

Breathe out as far as you can and then hold your breath for as long as you are able. You can alternate holding your breath and taking short breaths if you feel a bit dizzy.

You should start to pee and although it sometimes stops and starts, this seems to work most of the time.

I haven't used a cubicle for a while now and it gets easier the more times I try it. I'm not cured and am still nervous about urinals but try it for a while. Good luck.

Re: USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?

Posted by Jon on 13/1/2012, 8:04 am, in reply to "USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?"

Hi Deklan,

I spoke to my GP about this condition last year and was referred to a urologist. I discharge myself from her care I was in a disagreement with the diagnosis test she wanted to do. Bladder stress test etc. However at the same time I was visiting a registered Homoeopath which the NHS was paying for. Some parts of the country the Local Primary Care Trusts fund this treatment. I discussed the condition with him. He prescribed me a remedy which I must admit has helped me. I am not 100% but I can stand next to someone in the urinal and urinate.

Some believe homeopathic remedies are mind over matter and only work due to the Placebo affect.. Yet, the same could be said for prescribed medicines. For example Prozac.

A Registered homoeopath will charge around £40.00 per hour for there time. Good luck

Re: USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?

Posted by The Therapist on 15/3/2012, 1:02 am, in reply to "Re: USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?"

I dont think anyone can say they are 100% cured because even non pauretics have bladder locks sometimes. I consider myself 99.9% cured though.
Regarding EFT I am surprised that your doctor recommended it. There is no empirical evidence that it is effective for any anxiety disorders. There will be anecdotal evidence of course but then I have had people come to me for CBT who got better for a while after EFT but then relapsed.(these were people with panic disorder though not pauresis)
Independant studies also show that EFT has nothing to do with meridian points and Chi energy. The anecdotal successes are more likely to be due to placebo effect and the tapping ritual may work in a similar way to hypnosis (focused attention and suggestion).But hypnosis generally doesnt help pauresis either. So I am afraid there are no miracle cures.CBT and desensitisation are the best there is. If you have other anxiety problems the GP may put you on an SSRI and this may make the desensitisation a little easier also. I know its hard but keep trying my friend.It can be overcome or at least made a lot milder. Good luck

Re: USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?

Posted by James on 2/4/2012, 7:43 pm, in reply to "USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?"

Dear Deklan

I am the same age as you (57) and had suffered with the problem for around 40 years. On 10 Feb I stumbled across the American site which described the breath-holding technique. Unbelievable. It works every time, anywhere. To my utter amazement a problem that has dogged me for most of my life has completely disappeared. It may not work as well for everyone but (having researched it further) it seems to work for a lot of men.

Re: USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?

Posted by Andrew on 3/4/2012, 6:15 pm, in reply to "Re: USING "THE URINALS OR TROUGH" ANYONE 100% CURED?"

Hi James

Could you describe how you do it? Most reports suggest the need to hold your breath for about 45 secs, leaving one gasping for breath? Is that the case for you.

Secondly are you physcally fit or sedentary?

Andrew

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